Ubukwe ni ijambo abantu benshi bumva bakarihuza n’ibyishimo n’ibirori by’agatangaza bitewe n’uko ari igikorwa gifatwa nk’intangiriro y’umuryango no kororoka utibagiwe na none ko ubukwe nk’umuhango biba ari ibirori biteguye neza bigashimisha imiryango kabishywe akenshi biba bifatwa nk’ibihe bitazagaruka kuwabukoze.
Ubukwe rero ni umwe mu mihango ikomeye mu buzima bwa muntu hatitawe ku myemerere ya muntu, idini, akarere, cyangwa se umuco gakondo w’abantu.
Mu Muco Nyarwanda rwo hambere, ubukwe bwahoze ari ubw’umuryango.
Imiryango iyo yabonaga ko umusore cyangwa inkumi bakuze kandi ko bageze igihe cyo gushinga urugo, yatangiraga gutera intambwe zagenwaga n’umuco.
Mu by’ukuri kugira ngo ubukwe butahe burangira, kiba ari igikorwa cyabanjirijwe n’ibindi byinshi ndetse na nyuma y’ibyo birori biba byahuriyemo imiryango hari ibindi bikorwa bikoza hagati y’abakoze ubukwe; ni ukuvuga Umukwe [Umusore] ndetse n’Umugeni [Umukobwa].
Mu migenzo myinshi yahuzwaga n’ubukwe mu Muco Nyarwanda harimo iyabaga ari ingenzi kurusha iyindi usanga n’ubu igikurizwa.
Muri iyo yose warondora, harimo Kurambagiza, Gusaba no Gukwa, Gutebutsa, Kurongora no Kurongorwa, Gutinya, Gutwikurura, Gusura Abageni n’indi myinshi.
Kurambagiza
Kurambagiza ni ukureba uburanga bw’umukobwa cyangwa umuhungu, ubwiza, imico n’imyifatire bye. Mu kurambagiza habagaho kumenya no kugenzura imyitwarire, imibereho, imikorere, isuku ndetse n’umuryango umuhungu cyangwa umukobwa akomokamo kugira ngo bamenye niba yarahawe uburere.
Umuranga ni we wafashaga imiryango y’abateganya gushyingiranwa kumenyana no gutunganya neza imihango ijyanye no kurambagizanya kwayo. Umuranga yabaga ari inshuti y’imiryango yombi ishaka guhana abageni cyangwa akaba umuvandimwe w’umuryango umwe, ariko aziranye n’abantu bo mu muryango bashakamo amaboko.
Iyo umuranga yamenyeshaga imiryango uwo yatoranyije, umusore n’inkumi bashoboraga guhura, bakamenyana cyangwa bakaganira mu buryo busanzwe.
Gusaba no gufata irembo
Gusaba no gufata irembo byakurikiraga kurambagiza, bikabera iwabo w’umukobwa. Imisango yo gufata irembo no gusaba yarihutaga kuko ubusanzwe mu Kinyarwanda ntawimana irembo. Iyo umuryango w’umusore wabaga wemerewe irembo, hakurikiragaho umuhango wo kurifata.
Mu gihe abo mu muryango w’umusore bagiye kumufatira irembo babaga bageze iwabo w’umukobwa, barakirwa bakazimanirwa maze uhagarariye umuryango w’umukobwa akababaza ikibagenza.
Umuranga, se w’umusore cyangwa undi umuryango w’umusore watoranyije ni bo bajyaga gusaba no gufata irembo. Umuryango usaba watangaga inka y’ifatarembo ku bifite cyangwa isuka ku baciriritse. Bwabaga aribwo bwa mbere imiryango yombi ihuye, ikaganira ku bijyanye n’ubukwe bw’abana babo, bakajya inama ku bizakorwa n’ibizakenerwa.
Gusaba no gukwa
Gusaba umugeni ni umuhango wakurikiraga uwo gufata irembo, ukabera iwabo w’umukobwa. Mu muhango wo gusaba, umuryango w’umusore watoranyaga abakwe bajya kuwusabira, bakagenda bayobowe n’umukwe mukuru, bitwaje inzoga yo gusabisha.
Wari umuhango wo guha agaciro imiryango kuko umusore ntiyabaga yemerewe gutwara umukobwa atamuhawe. Ibyo byari ikimenyetso cy’uko umuryango w’umuhungu uha agaciro umuryango wareze umukobwa.
Mu gihe cyo gusaba, umuryango w’umukobwa ntiwahitaga wemerera umuryango w’umusore umugeni, ibyo bikagaragaza kwihesha agaciro nk’umuryango no kugahesha abawukumokamo.
Nyuma yo gusaba hakurikiragaho umuhango wo gukwa ugakorwa n’umuryango w’umusore kandi ukabera iwabo w’umukobwa. Umusore yakwaga inka, isuka cyangwa andi matungo nubwo hose bavugaga ko bakoye inka.
Inkwano yabaga ari ikimenyetso hagati y’imiryango yombi, ko ibaye inshuti. Inkwano yari ipfundo ry’ubumwe hagati y’imiryango yombi.
Mu muco Nyarwanda, inkwano ntiyabaga inzitizi. Yaba yabonetse cyangwa itabonetse, ntibyabuzaga ubukwe gutaha. Igihe inkwano yabaga ibuze, umusore yashoboraga gutenda, ni ukuvuga gufata igihe aba kwa sebukwe akora akazi gasimbura inkwano cyangwa agahabwa umugeni w’ubuntu.
Gutebutsa
Ni umuhango wakurikiraga gukwa. Umuryango w’umusore wajyaga iwabo w’umukobwa hagamijwe kuganira ku gihe umugeni bazamubazanira (bazamubahekera).
Hari uduce gutebutsa byakorwaga inshuro zirenzwe imwe, umuryango w’umukobwa ugakomeza kwihagararaho kugira ngo umuryango w’umusore ubone agaciro k’umukobwa wabo.
Kurongora no kurongorwa
Igihe iyo cyabaga kigeze, umuryango w’umukobwa waramuhekaga ukamushyira umuryango w’umusore. Iyo yabaga ageze kwa sebukwe, hari imihango yakorwaga yo kumwakira ikagenda itandukana bitewe n’agace.
Hari nk’aho iyo yabaga akiri mu bikingi by’amarembo, yahagararaga hejuru y’aho batabye urusyo, nyirabukwe akamukoza umwuko ku mpanga. Hari aho umugeni yinjiraga agasanga sebukwe yicaye ikambere akamwicaza ku bibero akanamuha inka y’ibibero akabona kujyanwa mu mbere.
Mu gihe ibirori by’ubukwe byabaga bigeze hagati, se w’umusore yamujyanaga kurongora. Mu kurongora hakoreshwaga umwishywa, umusore akawambika umugeni hanyuma akivuga ati ‘ndakurongoye ndi kanaka mwene kanaka’ maze ababyeyi bakavuza impundu.
Ibirori byarakomezaga kugeza mu gitondo, abaje baherekeje umugeni bagasezera bagataha.
Nyuma y’uko abaje bahetse umugeni bageze iwabo w’umukobwa bagashyikiriza ababyeyi be umwishywa. Hakurikiragaho umuhango wo kwakira umwishywa ukabanzirizwa no gucunda, guca hagati no kumara amavuta.
Nta mukobwa washyingirwaga yaratakaje ubusugi kuko kubutakaza byabaga ari igisebo ku mukobwa, umuryango akomokamo n’igihugu. Uwabaga yatwise atarashyingirwa, yafatwaga nk’uwatesheje igihugu ubusugi, kugira ngo igihugu gisubirane iryo shema ry’ubusugi bwacyo, umukobwa bakamucira mu mahanga cyangwa bakamuroha.
i. Umusore uraye ari bushyingirwe
Bamutegaga amasunzu, bakamwogosha ubwanwa, bakamuca inzara mbese agakorerwa isuku yose yo ku mubiri. Bamwambikaga uruhu rushya cyangwa indengera z’abagabo. Bamwambikaga ibitare n’inigi nshya hanyuma abagabo bamutanze kurongora bakamwigisha uko azifata mu bukwe, uko azabana n’umugore uko azarongora harimo gucira imbazi,kwambika umwishywa, gukirana n’ibindi.
ii. Umukobwa uraye ari bushyingirwe
Bamutegaga amasunzu bakamukenura hose. Nyirasenge w’umukobwa cyangwa undi mugore wizewe wo mu muryango nka nyirakuru cyangwa nyina wabo yazaga kumuhana. Umukobwa n’umubyeyi ugiye kumuhana bajyaga ahantu hiherereye maze akamubwira uko azajya atsinda abakuru, sebukwe na nyirabukwe, uko azajya yubaha umugabo we akamurinda inzara n’inyota, akamurinda gukonoza akayoga kasigaye mu gicuma cy’umugabo.
Akamubwira ukuntu azajya y’ubaha abagabo babo, akabaha agaciro nkakumugabo we kuko ari baramu be ariko bikagarukira aho.Yamuganirizaga ukuntu azajya yirinda gutesha agaciro umugabo we, yirindakumena amabanga y’urugo.
Yamwigishaga kandi uko azitwara n’ahura n’umugabo we, uko azakirana akirinda kumuvuna cyangwa kumukibita ku kintu cyamukomeretsa, yamuhanaga kutagira inda nini ku biryo, ko yagombaga kurya bike ahubwo akinywera amata
Gutinya
Nyuma yo kurongorwa, hari iminsi umugeni yamaraga ari mu nzu adasohoka. Muri icyo gihe cyo gutinya yaboheraga nyirabukwe akebo k’ibara rimwe, bitaga nyirabitabo. Gutinya byafashaga umukobwa kumenyerana n’umuryango ajemo, akamenya imyitwarire n’imico biranga umuryango mushya ajemo.
Gutwikurura
Ni umuhango wakorwaga hagamije gusohora umugeni kugira ngo bamuhe uburenganzira bwo kujya ahagaragara, kugira ngo atangire imirimo ye. Habanzaga gukura abageni mu nyegamo, kubogosha amasunzu, guha abana amata no kubereka imitwa.
Mu kwerekwa imitwa, urugo rushya rwahabwaga ibyangombwa nkenerwa birimo ibikoresho, ibiribwa n’ibindi.
Umuryango w’umukobwa wabaga wamuzaniye ibiribwa, imyaka n’ibikoresho byo mu gikoni. Umukwe mukuru ni we watumwaga mu rugo ngo ayobore uwo muhango, aherekejwe n’abakuze n’amasugi.
Guca mu irembo no kuramukanya
Guca mu irembo byakorwaga n’abageni bajya gusura iwabo w’umukobwa. Uyu muhango wabaga nyuma y’igihe runaka abashyingiwe baramenyereye urugo kandi baratangiye kurukorera.
Abageni bajyanaga na se w’umuhungu, umuranga cyangwa se undi muntu washoboraga kubavugira ijambo. Bitwazaga inzoga, bagera iwabo w’umukobwa bagasangira kandi bakaganira hagamijwe gushimira umuryango w’umukobwa ko wabahaye umugeni mwiza.
Gusura abageni
Ni umuhango wakorwaga n’iwabo w’umukobwa ugakorwa nyuma yo guca mu irembo. Ababyeyi b’umukobwa bateganyaga inzoga n’izindi mpano bashyira urugo rushya, kugira ngo barufashe kwiteza imbere. Umuryango w’umukobwa wabonaga umwanya uhagije wo kuganira n’umukwe wabo kuko nta misango myinshi yabaga mu gusura abageni.
Hagati aho, hari n’imigenzo ndetse n’imihango yabaga mu cyitwa ubukwe yatumaga burushaho kugira icyanga. Muri iyi hazamo kumviriza, imihango n’imiziririzo y’abashyingiwe, gushyingira no gushyingirwa, kurongoranya, gukoranura, kwanura, gutandukana, gutandukana-umugore, gutandukana-umugabo, kubonera urugo, gutwikurura, gutekesha, gukuraho amasunzu, guca mu cyanzu, nyuma yo, kurongora, kwakira umwishywa, kurongora no kurongorwa.
Habagaho kandi n’iyitwa kumenyereza no kurisha umugeni, kubyukurutsa, gusenda abakwe, gukirana no kumara amavuta, gucunda, guca hagati, kumara amavuta, guca mu irembo no kwanura, ihaguruka ry’umugeni, inkuri n’igiseke, kuraguza no guterekera n’indibu, ikigagara, guhana umukobwa, kuraguza no guterekera, umuranga, kuraguriza umugeni, inzoga zo mu nkiga, kingogo, bushiru, n’ahandi.